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90-day Intensive Residential Treatment Program for alcohol and drug addiction
Midway Recovery Systems

How to Help a Loved One

Are you an enabler?
In the social or family setting, enablers are persons who genuinely care about an individual who has a problem such as alcoholism or substance abuse. Their love and care, unfortunately, often lead them to do things that actually help the substance maintain their destructive lifestyles. They “cover” for the abuser; inventing excuses for them. They “save” the substance abuser by taking on the abuser’s responsibilities or sharing in the denial of the problem. In their attempts to help, enablers, in fact, encouraging destructive behavior by shielding the abuser from consequences of his/her actions. Confronting the user with the truth and allowing them to “feel” the consequences is the only way to wake them up.

Alcoholism and drug addiction is a family disease. Living with the effects of someone else’s alcohol or drug addiction is too devastating for most people to bear without help. Detachment, a recovery tool for the family, helps family members to help themselves.
Al-Anon is the only worldwide organization that offers a self-help recovery program for the families and friends of alcoholics and drug addicts whether or not the alcoholic or addict seek help or even recognizes the existence of a problem. No dues or fees are required. Membership is voluntary, requiring only that one’s life has been adversely affected by someone else’s alcohol or drug problem.

Members give and receive comfort and understanding through mutual exchange of experiences, strengths, and hope. Sharing of similar problems binds individuals and groups together in a bond that is protracted by a policy of anonymity.

In Al-Anon you will learn: not to suffer because of the actions or reactions of other people, not to allow yourself to be used or abused in the interest of another’s recovery, not to do for others what they should do for themselves, not to manipulate situations so others will eat, go to bed, get up, pay bills, etc., not to cover up for another’s mistakes or misdeeds, not to create a crisis, and not to prevent a crisis if it is in the natural course of events.

Detachment is neither kind nor unkind. It does not imply evaluation of the person or situation from which we are detaching. It is simply a means for you to recovery from the adverse effects of the disease of addiction upon your life. Detachment helps families look at their situations realistically and objectively, thereby making intelligent decisions possible.